So, what worked? - TTC edition

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I know I'm very lucky in naturally conceiving and bearing a healthy first baby in my 40s.  

I'm recording what I did here, both for posterity and to remind myself of the hard work good luck often is founded upon.  

I put in a lot of work to conceive Pickle and on those days when I start to wonder if I am not cut out to be a mother, I can remind myself of how much I wanted her and the effort I put into it.

For the record, I think IVF is an amazing tool.  However, at 40 it was strongly inferred that, although my numbers all came back okay, I was simply too old.  

For that reason (and the fact I dislike the idea of unnecessary medical interventions) I didn't pursue the referral the doctor half heartedly offered but decided to do what I could to create an optimum environment in my body for conception.  

If I fell pregnant, then good.  If not, I'd be in better health in my 40s than in any other time of my life.

Ha!  I say that like I was sane, but in fact I was like any other woman having difficulty falling pregnant... slightly obsessed.

I did a lot of reading on fertility and fertile health in both men and women.  

I learned more about my cycle.  

Until my late 30s I was unaware that my menstrual cycle could be straightforward and pain free.  I had always experienced extreme pain from cramping, dark blood and large clots.  I thought this was normal and just to be suffered.  

It was eye opening to learn otherwise.  

Seriously - this information should be taught to girls when they first menstruate instead of teaching them to self medicate with painkillers.

I started recording my basal body temperature with a bbt thermometer each morning and learned I was still ovulating regularly.  

I made changes to my (already pretty healthy) lifestyle to improve my cycle and the health of my eggs.  

• I ate for fertility 
• ensuring my diet was rich in nutritious foods.  
• On the advice of Emma Cannon's "The Baby Making Bible' introduced both red meat and home-made bone broth into my diet.  
• I started eating breakfast and cut out alcohol and sweets to promote stable blood sugar.  
• I bought a slow juicer and drank freshly made organic green juice every day.

• Following the advice of Zita West and Marilyn Glenville, I took supplements (COQ10, Royal Jelly, Omega3, clover infusion, nettle tea, spirulina, maca, selenium) to improve my reproductive health.

• I've never been one for cosmetics, but swapped my skincare products for olive oil soap and coconut oil as moisturiser to decrease my exposure to topical toxins.  I have to say my prone to eczema skin has never felt better.  

• I stopped using the sauna and hot tub in the gym.  I can't remember exactly why.  Probably in case I was pregnant before I knew it?  I think I read something about overheating the body making it less likely for a newly fertilised egg to implant and couldnt find anything more about it.  Not taking any chances regardless!

• I was uncertain about acupuncture until I bought and read 'The Infertility Cure' by Randine Lewis.  
• I started seeing an acupuncturist and after only two treatments, my next period, for the first time in my life, was of the painless, bright red blood associated with fertile health.  
• I was thrilled to conceive Poppy the next time I ovulated after that.

• I practiced meditation and yoga (as best I could) and fell asleep listening to the Circle and Bloom natural cycle fertility programme playing under my pillow every night.  

• From a spiritual/energetic perspective I decided that if I wanted children in my life then I should have children in my life. So to that end 
• I volunteered for the local cub scout troop each week.  
• I also made an effort to focus on creation and nurturing.  
• Starting a garden to nurture, 
• Inventing recipes to nourish, 
• Even starting this blog to foster and record my creative side.

• After my losses I sought massage to help me physically and emotionally process the grief.  I also consulted a hypnotherapist to identify and address any mind/body issues.

Of course with so many things, I don't know what, if anything, was the 'magic bullet'.  

There is simply no way to tell. 

 It might be that after nearly five years of 'trying' it was just my time statistically.

On reflection, making an effort to do something (Anything. Everything!) to increase my odds gave me some sense of control and definitely helped my mental state.  Also taking good care of my body made me feel vital and healthy which also contributed to a better state of mind.

While I (probably like every other not-yet-pregnant woman) would be quite happy to throttle anyone who says 'maybe you should just relax' -  deep down I believe that, for me, (a bit of a workaholic), there may be an element of truth in it.  

Not in taking a brief holiday, or not thinking about how to conceive, or anything cursory, but in consciously taking actions to de-stress my mind and body and prepare myself to be a mother as much as possible.

Ultimately, I believe not working and practicing extreme self-care gave me the opportunity to take a physical break and discover the mental space needed to slow down and allow a baby to come to me.

I am so grateful.

Red Lentil Soup

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Poor Mr Duncan, after going to all the effort of making a lamb chop dinner last night, he wasn't able to eat it.  It turned out he had a fever and no appetite. 

Today he's been in bed sleeping for most of the day (when he's not coughing his lungs out).  I made him chicken noodle soup for lunch, but he just sipped some of the broth and went back to bed.

For dinner I made red lentil soup - nourishing, easy to digest with protein and iron. I normally make a Turkish kırmızı mercimek çorbası recipe when I make red lentil soup, but had no root veg and wanted something a little less spicy and more warming so went for a bit of a Moroccan feel with the addition of cinnamon and turmeric.

Fertility focus

Lentils are a good source of folic acid, full of iron and provide a non-meat form of protein.
Home made Chicken Stock (I basically follow the same method as Naturally Knocked Up) is recommended in The Baby Making Bible by Emma Cannon for nurturing fertility and was also suggested by my acupuncturist for building my blood, as I eat little red meat.

Turmeric is good for stabilising blood sugar levels which helps with managing weight and hormone balance.

Cumin is considered good for uterine health in Ayurvedic medicine.

Ingredients

• coconut oil
• cumin seeds
• ground coriander, tumeric, smoked paprika, cinnamon, salt, pepper
• 1 diced onion
• approx cup red split lentils
• 1 tin tomatoes
• 500 mls home made chicken stock
• additional water
• red chilli flakes
• lemon juice
• chopped parsley

Method

1.  In your soup pot, 

•     toast the cumin seeds over a low heat, 
•     melt the coconut oil and 
•     add the remaining spices.  

2.  When the spices are aromatic, sweat the onion until soft

3.  Add lentils, tomato and chicken stock (I just add mine still frozen)

4.  Bring to boil and simmer for about 30 minutes or until the lentils are soft. 

5.  Stir in red chilli flakes and chopped parsley.

6.  Blend with a stick blender until almost smooth (I like a bit of texture)

7.  Garnish with natural yoghurt and parsley sprigs and serve with Turkish pide or bread.

Enjoy!

L.x

Butternut Squash, Spinach and Chickpea Curry with Chapati

Home made chapati

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I've been reading The Fertility Diet by Sarah Dobson.  And although my usual eating style is very close to her suggestions I want to further increase our intake of healthy whole foods and cut down on Mr Duncan's consumption of meat.

This week we got a butternut squash and some spinach.  

Now I love making pumpkin soup with any orange coloured squash and steamed spinach is one of my favourite side dishes but we have loads of spices to use up before we leave for Australia so I decided it was time for a curry.

Fertility focus

Turmeric is good for stabilising blood sugar levels which helps with managing weight and hormone balance.
Home made Chicken Stock is recommended in The Baby Making Bible by Emma Cannon for nurturing fertility
Chickpeas like all legumes are a good plant source of protein.
Butternut Squash is rich in Vitamin A and also contains zinc and selenium
Spinach, like all leafy greens, is rich in iron, folic acid and vitamin K
 

Ingredients

• Coconut Oil
• Onion
• Garlic
• Ginger
• Tumeric
• Garam Masala
• Butternut squash
• Chicken stock
• Chickpeas
• Coconut milk
• Spinach 

I made this for two (though it turned out to be three servings) with half a butternut squash, half a tin of chickpeas and about 100mls coconut milk.

Method

1.  Heat a teaspoon of coconut oil in a wok and sweat roughly chopped onion until softened.  

2.  Mix in finely chopped garlic and ginger then add turmeric and garam masala.
3.  While the onion is sweating, peel and chop the butternut squash into bite sized chunks.  

4.  Add the chopped butternut to the wok and fry off a little until all covered by spices and onion.  

5.  Pour in enough chicken stock to just cover the squash.  

6.  Put on a lid and let it simmer for about 15 minutes until the butternut is nearly done.
7.  Add coconut cream and chickpeas and simmer uncovered until the sauce thickens enough to cling to the back of your wooden spoon.  

8.  Stir in chopped spinach until it wilts.

I served this with home made chapatis based on a very cut down version of this recipe - basically half a cup of flour, a dash of olive oil and water, rolled very thinly and dry fried for about 45 seconds on each side.

L.
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